How to add enchantment to every day

“Wonder is the beginning of wisdom” – Socrates

If we choose to be fascinated in what is going on around us it can help turn something that we may feel trapped by into something more wonderful. So says my podcast mate Tonya Leigh (yes, I know I’m banging on about her a lot these days but I’m catching up on about 5 years of podcasts).

She also offered a few other suggestions to find the enchantment in everyday:

Place fresh flowers around the house. They add beauty and are alluring as well as being able to lift your mood and shift your energy.
Find the perfect colour lipstick. As someone who doesn’t wear make-up, this sounds frightening. I have a pinkish colour lip balm but that’s about it.
Take a walk in the woods, get out in nature and wonder at the trees and flowers and how they provide us with cleaner air.
Burn a decadent scented candle. I usually have the same scented candle all year round, Angels Wings from Yankee Candle, and at Christmas I get the Christmas Cookie one just to mix things up a bit. At a recent shop at Costco, I found a pack of three scented candles – one is Dark Pomegranate, one is Vanilla Bean and the other is Cassis and Fresh Fig. They may not be the Japanese Quince that TL refers to, but they smell quite nice.
Look at everything with wonder and awe. Think about how or what processes something had to go through to get to you, like a bottle of fine wine.
Dress up with a little flair. Put thought into how you show up. This is ok but you have to constantly keep an eye on the weather in the UK. You might think you have your outfits sorted out for the week ahead, but the weather is so changeable you’ll need to be flexible.
Have an afternoon tea ritual. Slow down and relax whilst breathing in the aroma of a herbal tea. To me the phrase “afternoon tea” also requires there to be cake. Maybe that’s ok too.
Stargaze and make a wish, contemplate the bigger things in life whilst staring out to the universe.
Mesmerise with melodies. Choose music that lifts your spirit and energises your mood.
Host a dream party. Instead of talking about everyone’s woes and worries, indulge in discussing dreams and desires.

Enchantment is not what you do but how you do it – seeing the beauty and mystery in everyday life. How will you be enchanted today?

Skylarking around Dengie Deliveries

Annual Report delivery day #2 took us out to the Dengie Peninsula, a stretch of Essex coastline that is formed by the Rivers Crouch and Blackwater, both tidal, and the North Sea to the east. The boundary of the Dengie Hundred ran from North Fambridge to west of Maldon.

We drove out to via Purleigh to Bradwell on Sea, home of the power station (not The Power Station – Robert Palmer and escapee Duran Duran band members) and the Chapel, where St Cedd landed to teach us heathens about Christianity in 654 AD. We walked down to the Chapel, then instead of turning left, the usual route that walkers take along the coastline towards the power station, we decided to talk the right hand path that tracks along the saltmarshes towards Burnham on Crouch. We walked for a while then stopped for a packup lunch and watch a bit of nature.

I have one of those apps that helps you identify birds by their call, so when I set it off, it told me that the riotous squawking was coming from Skylarks. We couldn’t see any but they were making an almighty racket. Then there was a different sound, just in one particular spot, and the app told me that was a Redshank. Again, couldn’t see any but this one was rather vocal. We also spotted, but didn’t hear some gulls, mallards, a coote and a solitary egret type bird. There were some other sea birds a bit further out be we couldn’t make them out.

After our 4 mile round trip, we started our deliveries. Reports for Bradwell, only we went up and down the same stretch of road about 4 times trying to find a house name. Then the return journey via Southminster to Tillingham and then Burnham on Crouch.

When we arrived at Burnham we decided to have another little walk along the river edge. And stop for the obligatory ice cream. What a palaver that turned out to be. There are two ice cream outlets opposite each other. One seemed to have a long queue, the other didn’t, so we joined the one with the shorter queue. Then we noticed that they had a sign telling you that basically they’d run out of all flavours of ice cream except two. So we turned around and joined the other queue. It took FOREVER to get served. There seemed to be four staff, one on ice creams and the other three taking it in turns serving chips and hot food, or standing around chatting. The young lady serving the ice cream seemed to have the memory of a goldfish. If you gave her too many options, she just couldn’t remember it. And from the time of taking your order, and your money, to actually starting your order, she had everything jumbled up. It must have taken at least 20 minutes to get our order. We did wonder whether it was worth it, but when you so close to the front of the queue, you kind of have to stay with it.

Anyway, eventually with ice cream in hand, we continued our walk passed some houseboats and the playing field to as far as we could get along the harbour, where the marina is. We clocked up another 1.7 miles.

A leisurely drive back home through the countryside and back into the city, on a beautifully day. Tomorrow’s adventure takes us north!

Natural Wellbeing

I’m reading an article in the most recent Psychologies Magazine about how regular time in nature contributes to wellbeing of mind, body and soul, and it suggests that even spending 5 or 10 minutes outdoors with nature can be beneficial in reducing anxiety and can make us feel happier.

I know that I don’t get to spend nearly enough time outside. I do try to go for a walk at lunchtime, but quite often, due to location, that around a housing estate or hospital grounds. We are fortunate that there are open fields behind the hospital and I get a move on I might just have time to go that way. I guess even in a housing estate, nature has its place in well-manicured (or even overgrown) gardens and hedgerow. You just need to look hard enough.

When we were kids we used to holiday most years in the wilds or North Wales. A beautiful spot with mountains to climb, trails to walk and forests to play in. In adult years, when we’ve been away, we’ve always had what we’ve called “long walk day”. A day put aside (hopefully with good weather) to go on a 5-10 mile trek. No distractions but the views around us. Taking in the sights and sounds of nature doing its thing.

Having to work most days means that going out for long walks or further afield is not easily achievable. However we are lucky that we have some nice park spaces quite nearby.

According to the 10 question quiz that always accompanies these articles the thing that I should find most benefit from time outdoors is grounding.

“If you crave calm or wish you feel more grounded and connect to what matters, upgrading the quality of the time you spend in nature ma provide the shift you need. It’s easy to spend time outdoors on autopilot, or use it as a way to being with others – but you’ll benefit most from spending at least some time in nature on your own, so you can tune into the stillness and connect with your inner calm. If your tendency is to live in your head, time in nature can be a much-needed way of paying attention to your physical self. Finding the ground beneath your feet may even be the first step to finding a new direction in life.

You’ll get the most benefit by focussing on the here and now as you walk. Don’t give yourself a hard time if you can’ leave your emotional baggage behind but, when you become aware that you’re caught up in thinking, direct your focus outwards by noticing the colours, textures, sounds, smells and sensations. We can all benefit from a daily grounding ritual but, for chronic over thinkers, it can be life-changing”

Like most people, I haven’t had a proper holiday for nearly a year and a half now (since summer 2019), so when we are able to, I will relish the chance to get out and have some time to wander around new places and spaces to take in the sensations.

Snow joke

All over the UK today people have been posting photos of snow scenes and hastily assembled snowmen. It all looks lovely.

Here though, we did get a quick flurry early afternoon but nothing settled. There is a threat of more snow overnight though.

Snowy scenes seem to make most people feel all magical. The silent fall, often overnight, create some mythical scene. Snow seems to bring a sense of clean calmness to most people. It may be that it instigates memories of childhood, snowball fights, building snowmen or keeping warm under many layers and drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows. A more innocent time perhaps. There’s almost something naive about it.

Last time I was anywhere near serious amounts of snow was when we went to Slovenia. We went husky sledging and snow shoe walking in the mountains. It was one of the best holidays I’ve experienced.

Being the first to leave footprints in the snow and hear the crisp crunch under foot. It makes nature look all the more beautiful.

Today though I was reminded that not everyone enjoys the snow. People don’t like snow for a number of reasons. Its frozen, damp and after a while gets dirty. It changes plans by preventing travel. It can be dangerous especwhen it turns to slush or ice. Some people find totally white landscapes depressing. For some its another reminder that spring isn’t here yet. Some people also find snowmen quite menacing.

Thankfully our flurry didn’t settle so hopefully my first drive back on site for 3 weeks won’t be a problem.

Winter Walks

We needed to drop some documentation off to a friend for their signatures so decided to use it as an opportunity for our daily exercise walk. They live about 2 miles away, so it wasn’t going to be too hard to walk there and back. In fact we’ve done it several times, especially last year.

Having looked at the weather forecast for the week ahead it was declared that today would be the better day to do that.

We start by walking into town, then taking the footpath round the back of the University campus. This takes you northwards along the river and up through a park before joining the housing estate where our friends live.

As we’ve walked this route many times over the last 10 months we’ve seen the landscape change. We’ve seen it through spring and summer and autumn and now winter.

The river rises with the rain fall and floods the surrounding fields, then it recedes to reveal dried out earth in the heat of summer. The trees bud, leaf and become home to wildlife, then shed to reveal the abandoned birds nests.

The number of people we pass fluctuates with the seasons. Everyone and his mother was out in the summer. You ran the risk of being run over by errant cyclists who seem to think they own the footpath. Children who have no idea how to walk in straight lines don’t seem to get out of the way whichever side of the path you walk on. And dogs. Dogs on leads, dogs on the loose, dogs walking calmly, dogs getting hysterical at the thought the ball might get thrown any second now. Dogs that want to come and say hello, and dogs who look at you for help as this is the eleventybillionth walk they’ve been on today.

Only the die hards venture out in the winter time. Everyone wrapped up in hat, gloves and scarf. Breath visible in the cold nip of air. Hardly any birdsong. Everyone walking with more sense of urgency to get back home in the warm.

We get to our friends but of course we can’t go in. We weren’t even going to stop, just push an envelope with the documents to sign through the letterbox. They heard the rattle so popped their heads up at the window like meerkats on the lookout. Then came to the front door to say hello. We stood well back at the end of the garden path. We didn’t chat for long as didn’t want them standing on their doorstep, letting all their home’s warmth out. Then we trudged back home.

A slightly different route back for a change. Took us along the side of the railway line back into town. Didn’t see any trains go by. The footpaths were a bit mucky. By now it was getting a bit dark. I was getting a bit warm under all the wrappings. I was ready to get back home and have a nice cup of mint tea.

4.5 miles walked in an hour and a half (including chatting time). That’s my exercise for the day.

Surround sound

How often do we get an opportunity to just sit and listen, I mean REALLY listen to the sounds around us?

Both C and I were sat out our respective desks in the study, going about our business when it suddenly hit my ears there there was silence. Neither of us were speaking. At the time neither of us was hammering our keyboards or frantically clicking a mouse. But then I noticed the non-silence which actually became quite loud.

I could hear the birds twittering in the back garden, as clear as a bell. The hum from the fan on C’s PC, continual hum. The wall clock ticking, so loudly too that it beggers belief that sometimes you barely notice it at all. There was an occasional mouse click as one or other of us scrolled up whatever it was we were reading on the screen. There was a throat clearing after a glug of water. There was a chair squeaking under the pressure of shifting weight. There was an airplane outside on its way to, or from, who knows where. There was pen scratching on paper as I was making notes. There was a belly rumble and an over emphasised exhalation.

Within the space of somewhere between 5 to 10 minutes there were all these sounds surrounding me, but there was silence. Peaceful, gratifying, restorative. All of these amazing sounds that I might have missed had the radio in the kitchen been on, or had I been hammering away at documents or emails, or people talking.

Silence can provide us with so many benefits if we choose to allow them into our lives.

It can allow us to concentrate and focus, which apparently can be lost if the sound is over 80 decibels. Obviously the writer of that point has never been to a #bellringing practice where concentration is required despite the noise of the bells.

It can allow our minds to be more creative. Some eminent scientists did their best creative work after a period of solitude and quietness.

It can allow us to discover how we may improve our lives when attention is given to self awareness practices. Taking time to self reflect can help figure out what and where we want to be.

It can help relax us and reduce stress levels if we allow a period of silence.

It can affect our ability to learn. The more noise we are exposed to the worse we perform and find it harder to concentrate.

Doing nothing and remaining silent can increase productivity of new brain cells, which in turn supports greater productivity as much as tenfold.

Silence can help cultivate calmness and peacefulness when you regularly practice silence and patience.

If you are able to, I invite you to sit somewhere comfortable and just be silent for even just a few moments. Make a note of all the things that you can hear in the silence. You’ll be surprised how much surround sound there is.

Going Potty

During the first lockdown our daughter came back home to stay for a couple of months whilst she was furloughed. Along with her came at least a dozen pot plants. Sadly her larger ones that had to be left behind didn’t make it.

Whilst she was at ours she decided to do something constructive so undertook a free on line course about houseplants. She really got into it and every time we went for our daily exercise walk she’d talk about various types of plants and where they’re from and best suited etc. And every time we went anywhere near a shop she’d buy another plant. Even from the supermarket when doing the food shopping. Soon our house was getting over run.

For the last couple of years she’s given me plants for birthday, Christmas and Mothering Sunday. They usually come accompanied by a small piece of paper with hand written information about the plant. And some even have names. Howard the aspidistra is a firm favourite along with Monica the Japonica.

For Christmas we couldn’t spend the time together as we’d hoped so she sent our presents directly. Then she was concerned that the main present wouldn’t arrive in time so sent another one by next day delivery. Well, they both arrived in time and of course were both pot plants.

She’d even paid extra for a lovely outer pot for one of them which according to what she’d been told would be big enough. Well of course it wasn’t, but no matter, we can use it for a different plant instead.

Anyway, one of the plants already seems a bit pot bound and is distorting the shape of the pot its in, so we need to repot it.

His nibs decided that we would use our daily exercise to walk to B&Q to get some new pots and more potting compost. Sounds like a good plan. Kill two birds with one stone. It was only 2 degrees outside so I got dressed up in my big winter coat, hat, scarf and gloves.

Started off ok, nice pace, nippy around the edges but not too bad. Now B&Q isn’t exactly around the corner. The round trip there and back was 6.7 miles and took us 2 hours 22 minutes. And on the way back I was carrying the compost.

By the time we’d almost got home, my arms felt like they were going to drop off, my legs were giving up and I was actually now incredibly warm.

Just for a ruddy pot. This plant better like its new home once its been repotted. I for one can’t move now.

Favourite corner #2

This is my next favourite corner of the house. Its in the new office space set up in the study where I can work from home.

Its not my favourite corner because it means I can work from home, but because the photos that were put on to canvas were taken by daughter before she really knew what she was doing with a camera. She went on to study photography at university.

I used to have these on the wall in my office at work but since I don’t currently have an office to myself, and I’m not always there, I didn’t want them getting lost or taken by someone else. I thought they would make something lovely to look at whilst I am working from home and after some inspiration. They also remind me of my favourite person.

If you Google “good things about corners,” you get a plethora of ideas about how to decorate awkward or empty corners, or design ideas for corner shelves. You also get quotes about turning a corner and such like.

I’m not sure that I’ll manage 10 interesting corners in my house as most of them are full of stuff and either untidy or uninteresting. I might have one more before I might have to move on to the next 50 by 50 thing.

Strolling, strolling, strolling

Something I try to do every day is go out for a walk. Sometimes it might just be walking into town, during a working week its around the hospital grounds at lunchtime, and sometimes its a bit more of a planned event, like Tuesday’s epic Thames Path.

On Monday afternoon I took myself for a walk around the block whilst C was waiting for a parcel to be collected. I simply wandered up the main road to the local park, around the edge of the park and back down the back streets. Not very far, but enough.

Wednesday C needed to pick up a prescription so we walked to the GP surgery, about a mile, then can back via the old Cinder Track, a footpath that links the estate where my parents live to the city centre. This path I have trod many times in my childhood.

It seems that a lot has changed along that path since I last went that way. The actual path is the same 2 lane affair. Pedestrians to the left, cyclist’s the right, as you head into the city. But what was once just old scrubland has been turned into a pleasant little tree covered pathway, with children’s play things and benches, and notices telling you about the wildlife that frequents the area.

For all that new scenery there was a sense of the familiar. I’ve walked, run and cycled along that path and back so many times. Its nice to see the scrubland repurchased, but its nice to have the familiar crunch of the path underfoot.

Things change and they can change rapidly and sometimes unexpectedly. Its inevitable that things will progress and move on. Things will never stay the same forever.

As human beings we need to be adaptable and resilient in the face of change. Sometimes that’s easier said than done. I try my best to adapt to new things, like virtual #bellringing rather than the real thing and I try even harder to be resilient. Sometimes going for a walk to clear my thoughts helps with that.

Good news: watching cute animals is good for you

Those of us that are connected to multiple social media sites will not have failed to have been spammed at some point by video clips or memes of cute animals doing cute things.

According to goodnewsnetwork.org a study by Tourism Western Australia and University of Leeds we don’t actually have to see the real deal in order to feel a sense of reduced stress levels.

To be fair their sample size was only 19 participants who were students and academics at the University and about to sit exams or had declared feelings of stress at work. They were shown a 30 minute slide show of cute stuff.

Heart rates were reported to have dropped and blood pressure went from 136/88 to 115/71. Anxiety levels dropped by 50%. One of the conclusions was that video was better than still image and therefore the expectation would be that physical closeness would be even better.

Quokkas found in Western Australia are little rodent type critters who have a cute smiley face and now apparently have their own TV station where you can watch them all the time.

I think the nearest thing we’ll be allowed in the office is a few posters, although we did have a visit from Sam the Therapy dog once.