Communicating like a Queen

How you communicate with others can inspire, or cause people to ignore you, but the way you communicate sends a powerful message to yourself. Every day we communicate ourselves to the world. The way we show up, the way we carry ourselves and the way we speak sends a very powerful message.

So, podcast fave Tonya Leigh suggested we focus on communication, to not be afraid of speaking out, communicate how we feel and ask for what we want. She shared her seven tips on how to communicate like a Queen:

  1. No blaming – the minute you start to blame someone else for how you feel or for what has happened you become a victim. Take full responsibility for how you feel because that’s where your true power comes from.  The minute you blame someone else you are giving them power over you.  Practice saying “I am feeling this because of what happened”, so honouring what has happened but own how it made you feel. Don’t make someone else responsible for your emotional state.
  2. Be honest – we spend a lot of time lying to ourselves and lying to others. Saying yes when we mean no, not being truthful about how we feel about things, becoming resentful and angry. If you are honest you bypass all that drama. Being honest forges strong relationships with others.
  3. Be direct – ask for what you want/need, straight up without beating around the bush.  Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you don’t want to do something or go somewhere, just say so.
  4. Listen – really put yourself in the other persons shoes without needing to feel you have to have all the answers.  If you’re listening to someone else and at the same time trying to figure out what to say in response, you’re not really listening, you’re not present with the other person. 
  5. Speak with confidence – commit to what you want to do, what you belief.  Stop saying you’ll try.  Commit to doing it. If your language is all wishy-washy you’re not committed, don’t trust yourself to follow through. 
  6. Speak from a place of power – stop saying your struggling with something.  Ask for the facts of it and start to look at the possible solutions and how you can navigate this challenge, what it is trying to show you. 
  7. Speak from a place of love – you will find you will choose different words, say less, be more intentional and the result is so much more beautiful that when you speak from place of anger, frustration etc. It doesn’t mean you deny how you’re feeling, you can still set boundaries, you speak your truth.

When you practice all of these steps it puts you back in charge and communicating like a Queen.

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